


Goodbye, Apathy

by patroclux



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: AU, Light Angst, M/M, Possible Spoilers, Post-Battle of Starkiller Base
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-21 05:27:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6039982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/patroclux/pseuds/patroclux
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He lived for strength, for power, for victory. But in the end, in the fading and fleeting moments that ticked past here and now, he didn't care for any of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye, Apathy

**Author's Note:**

> note: if you haven't seen the force awakens yet, i would not recommend that you read this fanfiction until you have. there are some vague spoilers for the end of the movie below.

The snow fell too gently for such a harsh environment. It was all so false, all such an insufferable _lie_ obscuring what lay carved into the surface, a cut so irrevocably, unfathomably deep. Cut to the core.

Slowly, steadily, the frozenness of Starkiller numbed the pain weaving through Kylo Ren’s broken body. He knew that if he laid here long enough, the pain would dissipate completely. And for that reason, he had to get up. He had to keep moving, keep fighting. Survive, as always.

The thing was, he didn’t _want_ to be a fighter anymore. Or maybe it was only in the moment.

It was peaceful here, the only degree of peace Kylo had ever felt to enjoy. Peace had always meant leisure, and for someone like him, leisure didn’t exist. He lived for strength, for power, for victory. But in the end, in the fading and fleeting moments that ticked past here and now, he didn’t care for any of them.

The girl – Rey was her name. Her voice rang in his ears, her words unspeakably true. He was little more than a monster, a creature in a mask. Metal instead of man. Hiding because he couldn’t bear to look at himself and see the person he could’ve been, hiding so that no one else would see his pain; his weakness.

What did it matter? He asked himself. What was the point of any of this?

There wasn’t time to contemplate answers. The sound of an approaching shuttle crashing through the still-standing trees forced him from his reverie.

“Ren,” a voice said – a voice he hardly heard; wracked with desperation and hopelessness. A darkly clothed figure dropped to its knees in the stained snow beside him. Fumbling hands found their way to Kylo’s face. “ _Ren_.”

**Author's Note:**

> My latest obsession: Star Wars. Send help. 
> 
> Many more fanfictions of my spirit animal, Kylo Ren, to come. Hope you enjoyed! :)


End file.
